If you’ve been following sports, you probably know that the St. Louis Blues won the Stanley Cup last night. They went into Boston and beat the Bruins, 4-1, in a rousing victory. Blues won their first title in franchise history. Now, I know what you’re all thinking… ‘Charlie, how can we root for the Blues when a lot of their fans are also St. Louis Cardinals fans, isn’t guilt by association?’ This is true and something I weighed heavy on before picking my rooting interest for a sport I do not watch of throughout the year. But there are so many other contributing factors that pulled me in the direction of the Blues, so, I’m happy for St. Louis people. Just promise me that some of you aren’t Cardinals fans.

The decision to be happy for St. Louis even if you did not watch a single bit of action is pretty simple. They have a fire flames theme song named ‘Gloria’ that motherfucking bangs in the best way possible. If I were a pop star, I would cover that and go to the top of the charts this summer. They have a puppy named Barclay that will grow up and work with kids who need a dog by their side. Most importantly, they rallied behind an 11-year-old girl named Laila who is battling a rare disease. All of these factors are great reasons to be happy for the City of St. Louis.

Let them have their parade with Brett Hull piss drunk then we’ll go back to hating the city and the Cardinals.

Charlie.